Part 2: social relationships - mental protective factor

We are human and we need people... it is, so to speak, in our nature to strive for social and interpersonal relationships. When we are still small, it is even a kind of dependency that ensures our survival. Because what baby can feed and change itself? It is dependent on the support, protection, and care of adults. For this reason, children are born with a secure bond of trust with their parents. A good thing, then...

But how many social relationships do we need to be happy and satisfied? 2, 8, 20? The more, the better? Does the feeling of happiness increase proportionally with interpersonal relationships, or does it eventually reach a plateau?

An exciting question! Unfortunately, I cannot give you an exact number. I think that there are individual differences here, which certainly also have to do with whether one is more of an extroverted or introverted person...

But as I already noted in my introductory blog post, we do not want to deal with the differences, but with the general laws applicable to every human being! How many social relationships does one need, then, as a minimum, to be able to develop optimally?

The answer might surprise you... but it is exactly one! But not just any one, rather a stable, attentive, reliable caregiver!!!

I came across this answer when I was writing a paper about children of mentally ill parents. It is interesting why some children of mentally ill parents become mentally ill themselves and others do not. One protective factor that, among others, makes the decisive difference is this one stable, attentive, reliable caregiver. These attributes are crucial!

What can be understood by "stable"? Certainly something like strong, resilient, and above all, constant! "Attentive" explains itself... this person must be our friend and not our enemy, and want only the best for us, and at best have acts of support and words of encouragement for us. And I interpret "reliable" to mean that this person must be tangible and signal responsiveness... we must be able to rely on them keeping their word and, at the very least, be able to fall back on them in an emergency.

I find these qualities very interesting. With this knowledge, we can now ask ourselves whether we are such a person for our child, or find out where there might still be room for improvement. In any case, I find it reassuring that, fundamentally, a single person is enough for a child to develop healthily and optimally... especially when I think of the many single mothers and fathers! You are doing a great job! Do not worry – you are enough for your child, especially if you try to fulfill the 3 attributes mentioned above!

My personal tip: Think about which social relationships in your own life fulfill all 3 qualities? If there is such a person, then you can truly consider yourself lucky. Perhaps you could simply say thank you to this person at the next opportunity, or perhaps you can be such a person for someone yourself?

With that in mind, I thank you warmly for your interest in my blog,

your Martina from LIONHERZ <3